One thing I didn’t anticipate was the crazy array of emotions that would come with being overdue. Tomorrow, I will officially be 41 weeks pregnant, and even though I had mentally told myself I’d go late the entire pregnancy…there is nothing that can prepare you for this. NOTHING.
The most jarring emotion that I didn’t expect was/is complete panic. Like, not worrying about how we’re going to care for the baby or anything, but just actual panic attacks that take my breath away where I can think nothing but “GET. HIM. OUT.” over and over again. Like, I feel like I cannot possibly be pregnant for one more minute. I’m not sure quite why, since I still feel pretty decent physically, but…I kind of feel like someone is sitting just an inch too close to me, and mouth breathing loudly in my ear, you now?
In other words, I’m struggling with…bodily integrity? Or something. Personal space, maybe. Either way, it is absolutely panic-inducing, and I feel kind of bad about it, because everyone’s all, “enjoy it!” and I’m sure I will miss the kicks and such eventually.
- Did two acupuncture induction sessions, one at 40w5d, one at 40w6d. It was painful as hell, even though acupuncture is usually pretty calming. The needles in the soles of my feet were particularly awful. I reacted strongly to many of the needles…but no contractions, just an active baby. My acupuncturist looked a little disappointed when I told her that.
- Have tried every natural induction method in the book—hours of walking, curb walking, spicy food…et cetera. Nothing.
- I have managed to do a respectable amount of freezer meal making. We now have homemade cinnamon and orange rolls, pizza dough, macaroni and cheese, meatballs, enchilada soup, and applesauce ready to go post-baby. Not too shabby.
- My crotch hurts. Pubic bone still feels like I’m being split in half.
- Swelling in the fingers and feet is kind of painful. Especially in the morning.
- Clothing situation is dire. Thank God for lululemon. I cannot go more than a few hours without spilling all over myself because of the giant belly in the way, though.
Anyway. This WILL be the last weekly update, since come hell or high water I AM GETTING THIS BABY OUT by Wednesday at the very latest. I’ll update when I can but may be a wee bit busy!