Skewed Perspective
This morning, I wanted to do a long run. Marathon training calls for 18 this week, and yet again, I fell short.
I knew I probably wouldn’t be able to bust out the full 18 since I’ve been in pain while running all week, but I at least wanted to get a respectable amount of it done. I started nice and slow, even doing a rough run 10 minutes, walk 1 pattern.
My first steps were painful, but the pain seemed to lessen after a mile or so. At mile 2.5 or so, I took one step with my left foot and felt a surge of excruciating, hot pain up and down the inside of my left leg. From then on, the pain was dull, but definitely present in both my leg and the outside of my foot. At mile 5, I felt like I had very little control over my left ankle, which was rolling in uncontrollably and causing a shooting pain in my arch and ankle.
I called it quits at mile 6.1. And I immediately felt awful. Could I still run? Yes, physically. Was it a good idea? Probably not. Was the pain unbearable? No, but it was definitely present, and I felt like a domino effect was happening—one pain triggered another and another and another.
I went home and started crying as soon as I saw Tim. I am going to be honest and say that I absolutely hate what marathon training has done to my perspective—I ran 6.1 miles today! And I felt terrible about it! And I shouldn’t! I’d bet that the vast majority of Americans can’t run that far. But I felt bad, because 6.1 =/= 18. And that frame of minds sucks.
At this point, I’d be lying if I said the thought of quitting had never crossed my mind, because it does, daily. But I think what I need to do now, frankly, is lower my expectations. I am going to talk to the orthopedist on Thursday about what is reasonable for me, and if that means running half the marathon and walking half, so be it. (I have almost no pain when walking; it’s almost exclusively reserved for running.) I may not run the whole way, but I will finish.
At least there’s always Chipotle.
Tim and I have a fun night of beer and roller derby (spectating) ahead, so hopefully that will take my mind off things!
What’s your favorite chain restaurant?
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Brie, I feel so badly for you. You’re right, though. Marathon training does skew your perspecitive. The other day at the gym I only had time to run two miles before Body Pump started; as I was gathering my weights, someone asked how far I ran. I was embarrassed to say only two miles. Like that’s not good enough, or something. The woman I talked to said she’d love to run two miles, but that was too much for her.
I pray that the orthopedist has some answers for you. This must be incredibly frustrating for you.
I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Roller derby sounds like a blast.
Brie-
Overuse injuries/injuries of any sort are incredibly frustrating. I’ve been where you’re at countless times! When you just want to get out and do something, but your body doesn’t let you, it can get you down. But think of how strong your body is to let you run 6 miles! I don’t think I could do that right now at all
I’m sorry you’re going though this, but awesome job listening to your body. Finishing up today at mile 6 sounds like an awesome plan. I always think of it this way:
“I can either be pissed and disappointed that I’m not able to finish my run/ride now, or keep going and hurt my body further, thus not allowing me to continue this in the future”. It’s up to you, and way to take care of your body.
I think you’re pretty much my twin! =P I’m also a 26-year-old, training for a marathon, wielding a JD with a deep love of Chipotle. Except I’m in Milwaukee. Feel your pain on cutting the run short, I hate that. Running is tough, that’s just the way it is sometimes.
I don’t want to be Debbie-Downer, but have you seen some doctors about this injury? It’s not good to power through the pain when it’s that bad. I hope you feel better!
This is just my opinion…. but from experience, I think you need to get outside more and get off the treadmill. A few years ago I did a lot of training inside, and I got hurt. I was sidelined for 4 months. Since then when I do hit the treadmill, i feel the pain coming back! I have never had an injury running outdoors. You need to get the experience of the road, the weather conditions etc. I know its easier to find the time inside, but I think you are doing yourself a disservice!
You still have time to get through this! Break up your long runs. So if you can only get 6 in one morning, run another 6 that night. Or if you can only run 7 at night, make up the rest the next morning. Sometimes thats the best you can do! And there is nothing wrong with that!!!
Hang in there. Mentally 18 is hard….. but 90% of all of this is the mental game! You can do it!!!!!!
Hey Brie! I’m so sorry about all the injuries you have flaring up. It’s really frustrating when your mind wants to do something but your body just says no. I would definitely wait and see what the doc says. It might even be a good idea to take a solid week or two off and see if everything just needs time to heal? I took a solid week off really close to my marathon in January and it was exactly what my body needed (I think I had a stress fracture). Good luck!!
I totally get where you are coming from, even though I’m not training for a marathon. I’ve gotten so used to working out 2x a day, that when I miss ONE of those daily workouts, I feel like there’s no point — if I can’t do it one, why bother try the other. I’ve recently had a knee injury (that I reaaallly should get checked out) and I always push myself to keep running, and it’s so hard to talk myself out of it. But you just gotta learn to tell yourself no! good luck and I hope you soon see the light at the end of your injury tunnel!
I think your plan to rest, adjust, and get your ortho’s advice is great. I used to run cross-country long ago, and persisting when you have a pain, be it foot, calf, knee, or something else, always ends in disaster.
Don’t feel bad, you are actually doing the right thing. Back in those days, one season I ran through foot pain (my dumb coach kept telling me to suck it up) and ended up missing the season. Once the pain got REALLY bad, I finally went to the doc and then the specialist, and a solution was found.
I missed fall season but was back in business by the spring. And since I now knew what to do- I’ve never really had foot problems since!
FYI we probably don’t have the same problem, but mine was similar in that the pain was reserved for running, as long as I stopped running, no pain when I walked. In my case I had no arch, and needed a custom made orthotic and specific running shoes, plus being careful about increasing my running mileage slowly.